Category: coding

  • Building the fastest PHP router ever

    Ok, so the title might be a little bit click-baity since I haven’t compared it to every router in existence. Just nikic’s Fast Route. On my sabbatical last summer, I was messing about with microservices (which I’m convinced are evil, but that is an article for another day). During that, I decided to create a…

  • Exploring the performance of FrankenPHP

    Exploring the performance of FrankenPHP

    Hi! This post is pretty old (like when FrankenPHP was alpha software) and needs to be redone! All the memory leaks have been squashed, and can do about 15k+ reqs per second and can completely saturate a network/cpu package, as of 1.0.3. The original post is below. If you live in the PHP world, you’ve…

  • Thoughts on PHP Fibers

    The last couple of days of my winter vacation, I wanted to really understand PHP 8’s fibers. To do so, I attempted to implement RAFT simply by reading the dissertation on it. My key takeaway was that it has been a really long time since I’ve tried to implement something like this by reading plain…

  • Dissecting WordPress: Hooks: Filters and Actions

    Dissecting WordPress: Hooks: Filters and Actions

    Many people tend to take WordPress hooks for granted (or loathe them). Hooks are a powerful way to change the [ex# name=’behavior’]behavior of WordPress fairly drastically.[/ex#][ex#d name=’behavior’] Hooks are built into WordPress. Without hooks, you’d have to fork the original code and modify it to change it’s behavior. They allow you to literally hook into…

  • Search is too good

    Search is too good

    I remember being eight or nine years old and wandering around the young adult section, trying to find a good book. I would basically just tilt my head and wander the shelves, reading titles. If something sounded unique or interesting, I’d read the first page. If I liked it, I’d take it home. Deep in…

  • There Are No Easy Wins — Stop Asking

    There Are No Easy Wins — Stop Asking

    How many times have you heard a manager ask: “What are the easy wins?”

  • Casem; an Experimental Language

    Casem; an Experimental Language

    Every few years or so, I like to try thinking up a new language for writing software. Mostly, I don’t publish them or even attempt to create a parser. This time. Well, this time, I blew my own mind with this one.

  • On Porting Beanstalkd to Scala

    On Porting Beanstalkd to Scala

    Beanstalkd is a notable and mature job queue. It’s written in C, rather sparsely commented, and moderately complicated. I wanted to add some functionality and discovered reading the code pretty tricky. The soundest way to learn what some system is doing is to rewrite it. At least for me. So, I did. In Scala.

  • The Right Place; The Right Time

    The Right Place; The Right Time

    In the Army, we had this saying: be at the right place, at the right time, in the right uniform. We also learn to do extensive risk mitigation. I’ve taken a lot of this to heart to learn that in the worst case, you end up in the wrong place at the right time, or…

  • Serverless: From a PHP Developer’s Experience

    Serverless: From a PHP Developer’s Experience

    this is suicide for all hosting companies that currently host all websites. Suddenly, no one would need servers. PHP would be, quite literally, the easiest migration to serverless known to mankind.